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mello_p_faff
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Name: Katie Country: United States State: Indiana Gender: Female
Interests: Music geek forever! I aspire to one day play my French horn professionally, whether in a symphony orchestra or a recording studio. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, in this world holds more power than music.Spanish is THE best language to learn - and the best language period. I want to live in a Spanish-speaking country some day.ΨΛΞ, sisters of the heart!And to be honest, where would I be without my God? I would be, and without Him still am, nothing. SDG Expertise: I speak Spanish with "practical fluency," meaning I can hold everyday conversations in the language and navigate situations on my own - though I am extremely nervous when talking with native speakers. Occupation: Student
Message: message me AIM: chick4Him0714
Member Since:
12/28/2004
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| It's surreal. One year of college down.
Life is changing. And fast. David graduated. Andrew graduated. My parents are moving. David is getting married. I'm a sophomore in college.
...and I've changed. I don't know how to explain it, but it's true. I'm not the same girl I was one year ago, and I'm definitely not the same person I was five years ago before high school. I wish I could say that it has been God who has been shaping me, molding me into a likeness of Him... but that's not thoroughly accurate. I have taken what may be described as backward steps in my faith. Certainly, I hold particular convictions less strongly, but may it not be a maturing of my faith, an application to "real world" scenarios?
I practically feel like crying in this moment, and I have no explanation for that. Perplexingly enough, I feel this urge often, and I can discern no logical reason for the tears. I guess the compilation of powerful emotions finds no better expressive avenue than that of crying. Strange.
I think I'm going to go play my French horn now. I've worked myself up. Goodnight all.
(to be continued... most likely...) | | |
| Are you kidding? Like, are you really serious?! That's it? The end? Again...? That's really it? Do I deserve nothing more?
You know, I'm kinda disappointed. Honestly, I had come to expect more from you. Correction: you never taught me to expect anything from you at all. Instead, I had come to hope for more from you. No, the disappointment doesn't lie with the outcome. Certainly I'm not happy, but I could be perfectly fine. In fact, I was doing well at Thanksgiving, but wasn't it you who changed minds? We see once again that, at least from my perspective, it was what I wanted but not what I needed.
I am a big girl. I can deal with life. You just have to give me a chance to do that. I don't think you realize the consequence of your actions or the message in your silence. But God is bigger than all of this.
I want to thank you, though. You have brought me back to my God, unfortunately by no virtue of your own but by my increased awareness of my recent behavior. You did open my eyes and show me the world. You are still my brother in Christ, and so I love you.
"I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." ~ Philippians 1:3-6 ~
Merry Christmas and happy New Year.
Have a good day. | | |
| Hmm, I forgot how much of my life I used to spend on here. I kinda miss writing out my thoughts, since I've been very negligent with my journal as of late. But alas, Facebook is a more effective tool for communication, so it has stolen my time and attention.
After completing my evals in Spanish on Wednesday, I engaged in an interesting conversation about the evils of Facebook. My friend is convinced it is a fad that will die in another 6 months; I say no. He also thinks three major corporations will soon rule the world: Google, Wal-Mart, and McDonalds. How true.
Well, let's see. The momentous occasion of an update deserves news worthy of such a miracle. Oh, here's something: My family is moving. Yep, after I have lived in the same house all my life, my family decides to move once I'm out of the house! Ahh!! I mean, I'm glad that I'm at least in college, and I've already made the adjustment to a new location, but when I go home on breaks, I kinda wanted to go "home," not just my parents' house. They are only moving to Columbus, IN, so it's not horrendous. I just know I will be taking trips to Lafayette often enough to see people, so y'all better play with me when I can come home!! I just know I'm gonna miss that community.
Other news... I love DePauw. I really do. I'm reminded of it when I walk outside on this beautiful campus. It's absolutely gorgeous with this snow. Oh man, it's entertaining to see how much excitement snow creates on a college campus.
Anyway, I know this is where I'm supposed to be. And I know I'm supposed to be in the School of Music. Oh yes, I've preserved my band geek-ness, which is evident in the ease with which I discuss music all the time. Heck yes, it makes me happy. Life as a music major is entirely different than, well not than anticipated, but than life in the College of Liberal Arts. The CLA kids just don't understand us SchooMu's. Mmhm, it's ok tho because the GCPA is my home, and I love the time I spend playing. It's really not that hard to practice three hours a day, unless I have an enormous Beethoven paper to write for my seminar... hmm...
I'm done with classes. Next week is finals. Then that's it: the end of my first semester in college. How weird! When did that happen? Who knows? It seems so unreal. I only have 9 more semesters. haha! Ah yes, 5-yr dual-degree. Go me.
Now that I've thoroughly exhausted all present (at least myself) and I've procrastinated long enough on my paper, I bid thee farewell. Godspeed on your finals and blessings for this Christmas season!! | | |
| All I can do is echo my last entry : "I'm sweetly broken, wholly surrendered." *sigh* So much to think about... IU Summer Music Clinic, Harrison/Sandwell (and Worcester) exchange, Cedar Campus, New Orleans, Ciudad Real, DePauw, Covenant, Harrison, West Lafayette! So many hopes, so many fears, so many concerns - joyous, triumphant moments among the sad, heart-wrenching moments. When will I find me again? Someday soon. Someday soon, I hope. | | |
| At the cross You beckon me. You draw me gently to my knees, And I am am lost for words, so lost in love. I'm sweetly broken, wholly surrendered. mmhm, amazing song... other than that: I'm so ready to be out of high school! Yeah, I do want to go to college, but mostly I just want the summer to be here. Three more days, guys! (oh crud, that means I need to go write my speech!) see you around! | | |
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